Unfortunately (for the world) meditators are more interested in the social aspects of meditation. There is on one side, Social Meditation. On the other side is, Meditation itself. Doing meditation. Not practicing… Doing.
Most people get into meditation because they think it’s going to help them calm down. De-stress. Relax after a hard day, or set their day off on the right foot. That is the main goal for most people, I’d say.
That goal is fairly easily attainable with a simple meditation practice. You can follow any number of styles to reach your goal.
People in this group generally come to believe that meditation is a social pasttime. There is a lot of talk about their practice with each other. Books are shared, opinions, hours and hours and thousands of hours of conversation and reading and commenting on Reddit and other meditation and Jhana forums to discuss all about it with words brought out by thought.
It may be that people get some peace of mind through just talking about meditation endlessly. It becomes a comfortable topic. Eventually, if you read enough, you might start to consider yourself an authority on meditation and start arguing with people in the Reddit threads about what this teacher or that said about meditation. You take a side. You defend it. You attack.
You start to feel like an expert on the topic.
An intellectual expert.
Most people who meditate follow Buddhism or Hinduism at least in part. They come to believe that these religions show us the ideal way to practice. There are hundreds of suggestions, rules, ‘truths’, and essentials to practicing according to these well-defined religions begun thousands of years ago. People think it must be the right way. Who could contradict all of that?
I didn’t set out to contradict it. At all. I couldn’t have cared less, to be honest.
I started meditation with a similar idea as most people. I read about it and practiced it, to see whether it helped me relax after a stress-filled day at school and work.
It did.
Within weeks I had found some peace of mind through meditation and the calmer states of the mind. I found I could use meditation anytime during the day to become less emotional and to feel more centered somehow. More in control.
And I did talk about it with whomever would listen. This usually meant friends who also meditated or trying to encourage others who didn’t practice to try it. I sat in groups and tried to meditate. I tried sitting cross-legged on the floor. Half-lotus. I had immense pain because of previous back injuries and tight muscles from running, cycling, and lifting weights.
But I was sure that the rules needed to be followed.
Buddhism had a LOT of rules. Surely, the entire world couldn’t be doing it wrong in following Buddhist meditation practice to the letter – I thought.
I pushed through the sitting on the floor part. I allowed myself a cushion under my bum and ankles if it was available. Eventually the back pain calmed down enough. Eventually I looked at the back pain long enough that it no longer meant ‘pain’ in the same way anymore.
It dissolved over time. Even today, 29 years after I started, pain is not looked at in the same way at all. That comes at least partially from experiencing it over and over and over during sitting sessions focused on the breath. Watching pain to see how it changed over the course of a session and many sessions.
Today I tell people to sit in a chair if the back hurts.
I see Buddhist meditation practice as a very slooooow way to practice. For that reason mostly, I see it as the wrong way to practice.
I’ve spoken with many monks here in Thailand, mostly foreigners, but also Thai, who have shared with me what they are doing in their meditation practice.
Their ‘meditation practice’ involves hundreds of things that have nothing to do with fruitful meditation. The result is that their practice stalls out. Most go nowhere with it. They are able to reach a calm state of mind – but not perfectly calm. Few reach Perfect Concentration. Fewer still reach any of the Jhanas.
Meditation to get somewhere requires Doing it. Just Do It. Remember? It applies here.
Just Talking About It doesn’t help. Just Thinking About It doesn’t help. Just Arguing About It doesn’t help.
Sitting down and Doing It is the best way to approach it.
Less reading.
Less thought.
Less talking.
No arguing.
After a short period of consuming books about meditation from every angle and talking to people about it over and over I finally settled on a solitary practice. I sat alone in my spare bedroom on the floor, on the rug every evening around 7 pm.
Gradually I threw out some parts of Buddhist practice (mythology). I realized that Buddhism wasn’t necessary. After all, Buddha wasn’t Buddhist. All that became Buddhism came after he reached Jhana and had insight into the truth about life.
As my concentration deepened and I experienced Perfect Concentration on the feeling of the breath in the nose and could sit for hours in that state, unaffected by anything else going on around me I realized the Buddhist ‘way’ is flawed considerably.
It’s filled with rules, like all religions. It’s filled with ancient texts that are supposed to hold truth for us today, but that are only distractions from our own practice and our own truths found while engaged in our meditative practice.
By now I’ve talked with hundreds of people who have been practicing mainly by focusing on the breath.
Most people have settled into a Feel Good Meditation Practice. They know how to focus on the breath. They do it to some degree. After sitting there for more than 20 minutes they settle into a nice state of mind. They just sit there in that state, sometimes looking at breath, sometimes looking at thought, sometimes looking at pain in back or some other part of the body, sometimes looking at feelings or doing insight questions of some kind.
And that’s their meditation practice. This goes on for years. Decades.
Eventually some wonder whey they’re not ‘there’ yet. They’ve been doing it so long. They’ve attended dozens of 1 to 10 day retreats, sometimes going as far as Thailand to join in.
They’ve had some occasional ‘breakthroughs’ that don’t last and don’t progress.
The Feel Good Meditation is good for most people. Meditation helps them get through difficult times and provides a daily stress reliever that’s free and doesnt’ involve drugs. They still love talking about it and sharing experiences and hearing about other people’s experiences. They have accepted (welcomed) meditation and their path as part of their lives they’d never give up.
The difference between this group and the group that progresses quickly in meditation and reaches Perfect Concentration and Jhana and other states is that the second group just Does It.
They tend to seclude themselves from outside influence and meditate on their own. They tend to follow a set system – whether strict or not.
They seek guidance when they aren’t sure about something. The fix it or get clear on it.
They make considerable progress.
Why are there so few people that do the work?
That’s what I’ve been wondering.
I think it’s that most people just don’t understand the PROFOUND positive changes that result with a serious practice.
Why don’t they understand?
Well, firstly, it’s impossible to communicate the benefits in a way that makes them tangible. I’ve tried to explain the changes that have taken place in my life here, here, and here.
I think one of the most universal benefits to meditating is it gives you a mind that is less reactive and more easily focused. I remember in the first months of my practice I felt like my brain was calmer inside. Like when you wake up in the morning and have that mind that is super calm and clear. Maybe before you get out of bed. It’s a perfect time to think about your day and how you can go about it in the smartest way.
That’s one of the first amazing benefits.
There are many more from that point, but if you don’t continue, you won’t experience them.
Anyway, this year I’ve had my eyes opened to the apparent truth that people are not really trying the right way to go further with their meditative practice. Most (by far) are happy enough with minimal feel-good type sessions and post sessions.
There is a NEW MINDSET that is available to those who follow a good path. A solitary path. A consistent path.
Meditating nine hours each day is not ‘the way.’ Even two hours I would say is too much for beginners because it is a lot of work to sit for two hours and try to focus on something with only the mind.
I believe I offer a good path here for people to try. It requires trying for a year let’s say. Many will have great benefit well before that, but you need to be ready to try for a year.
Once you have the ability to see Perfect Concentration, it all falls into place. Jhana is not far. A couple of little unlocks is all that is required.
I can’t give you this.
I don’t even know what it is.
I can only show you what I did to end up here.
I assure you, you won’t experience it by thinking about it, talking about it, or arguing about it.
Just Do It.
It’s not just about shoes.
[Photo at top: Meditators arguing over truth as one holds his fingers the way someone told him to and the guy in the foreground is drinking a whiskey. Hah! Love this AI creation. I told it to create an image of meditators arguing.]