This was one of the most odd things that happened to me during my period of meditation. I was meditating and I opened my eyes because I felt that something was there in front of me. I looked at the plain blue rug. I saw something there – a movement and a picture of something – an amorphous something that i “knew” was related to me and my family and that wasn’t a boy or girl specifically, but was something important nonetheless.
The next night, my wife called from the restroom as she showered… she had spontaneously aborted in the shower and I picked up the soft tissue of what was to be our new baby had it gone through the right process… It was very strange, and I guess the most bizarre experience of my life to have had a premonition of the event during meditation.
Baby Died
I envisioned a face
just days ago
on the blue rug
it appeared
as one’s self
disappeared
Like Fern and
like me
a blending of us
yet without gender
specifically
“Honey!”
She screamed.
3 times–“WHAT?”
The baby
fell today
hit the floor
with the softest
of sounds
The blood rinsed
quickly away
leaving a mass
of tissue
on the white
ceramic bathtub
There was
shock and nothingness
A hand wrapped
in white tissue
lifted our child
for closer inspection
veins were seen
and fleshy tissue
a toilet was flushed
and so were our faces
A sadness was felt
a relief too
a seriousness brought
to us who like
to overlook
No pain was felt
No tears wept
just thoughts of
what was
and no longer is
of what would have
been
An ending to
a search
for happiness
of self
for truth
a continuance of
conditioning, tradition,
death of the spirit